Divorce agreement from democrat party and their voters

Discussion in 'Politics' started by Theowl32, Dec 4, 2019.

  1. Theowl32
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    Theowl32 Platinum Member

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    DIVORCE AGREEMENT Between Republicans & Democrats

    WRITTEN BY A YOUNG COLLEGE STUDENT

    The person who wrote this is a college (law) student. Perhaps there is

    hope for us after all.

    THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY WELL PUT AND I CAN HARDLY BELIEVE IT'S BY A

    YOUNG PERSON, A STUDENT! WHATEVER HE RUNS FOR, I'LL VOTE FOR HIM.



    Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al:

    We have stuck together since the late 1950's for the sake of the

    kids, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship
    has clearly run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right for us all, so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.



    Here is our separation agreement: --Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a similar portion. That
    will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our
    respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.



    --We don't like re-distributive taxes so you can keep them.

    --You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU

    --Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military.

    --We'll take the nasty, smelly oil industry and the coal mines, and you can go with wind, solar and bio-diesel

    --You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore, and Rosie O'Donnell. You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them.

    --We'll keep capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart, and Wall Street.

    --You can have your beloved lifelong welfare dwellers, food stamps, hippies, druggies, and illegal aliens .

    --We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEOs, and rednecks We’ll keep Hannity, Carlson, and Bibles, and give you NBC, CNN, ABC, CBS, and Hollywood

    --You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us.

    --You can have the peaceniks and war protesters.

    -- When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security.

    -We'll keep our Judaeo-Christian values.

    --You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, political correctness and Shirley McClain. You can also have the UN. but we will no longer pay the bill.

    --We'll keep the SUV's, pickup trucks, and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Volt, Tesla, and Leaf you can find .

    --You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any practicing doctors.

    --We'll keep "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" and "The National Anthem."

    --I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute "Imagine," "I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing," "Kumbaya “or” We Are the World."

    --We'll practice trickle-down economics and you can continue to give trickle up poverty your best shot.

    --Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our flag. Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like-minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you might think about which one of us will need whose help in 15 years .



    Sincerely,
    John J Wall

    Law Student and American!
     
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    Last edited: Dec 4, 2019
  2. BluesLegend
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    BluesLegend Diamond Member

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    The left needs us, we don't need the left we'll get along just fine without them.
     
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  3. occupied
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    occupied Gold Member

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    This thing has been floating around for quite a while. Every so often it will be posted by some simpleton who seems to think they have found something extraordinarily clever and hilarious.
     
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  4. g5000
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    g5000 Diamond Member

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    Yep. It's been around since 2009.

    The OP writer is one of the more simple-minded folk on this board. He received a disgraceful education.
     
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  5. g5000
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    g5000 Diamond Member

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    In 2009, the Left posted a rebuttal:

    Listen, you are the one who married up, my dear. We are California, the Pacific Northwest, Hawai’i, most of the Midwest, Florida, the Mid-Atlantic and New England. Without us you are Mexico’s ugly step-sister to the north. Most of what we’ve done over the course of our 234-year marriage has been with your best interests in mind even when you literally rebelled. You tried to divorce us once before but we fought you and won. Why? Because despite all your many flaws, we still love you and want you to be better than you are.


    :lol:
     
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  6. rightwinger
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    rightwinger Award Winning USMB Paid Messageboard Poster Gold Supporting Member Supporting Member

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    Sounds like a plan

    We will keep the cities, National Parks, recreation areas, universities and banks

    You can keep the fly over states
    They are flyover for a reason
     
  7. Osiris-ODS
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    Osiris-ODS Silver Member

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    This reasoning always amuses me. Assuming for purposes of this premise that things would be strictly divided the way you're suggesting, those cities would quickly descend into a state of kill-or-be-killed anarchy, unless the tech industry has invented a way to 3D print food.
     
  8. Crepitus
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    Crepitus Gold Member

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    Ridiculous bullshit.

    Hope the kid wises up, bevause he's never gonna make it through college much less law school from inside the republic fake news bubble.

    Oh, and your thread title is a lie.
     
  9. Theowl32
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    Theowl32 Platinum Member

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    Since conservatives are responsible for the National Parks, we will keep those too. Besides, your delicate mentality could not handle living off the land.

    That we know.
     
  10. Augustine_
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    Augustine_ VIP Member

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    Lol what a faggy little snowflake that guy must be
     
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